They Really Should Require a Special License for That!

Yea... Y'all know what I'm talking about. How many times have you ventured out of your house or seen something in the news and ask yourself "Why in the HELL doesn't someone do something about...". It's really scary what people are getting away with outside of our personal environments.

I mean, evolution is supposed to be about survival of the fittest, right? Shouldn't that translate into the most mentally, physically, and emotionally capable? What's wrong with this picture??? Dayum...

Okay, you're driving along in your car... It isn't even rush (haha) hour. Raise your hand if you've seen that idiot who can't stay in his own lane. How about that car moving at light speed, weaving in and out of traffic? Or the "blue hair and knuckle" driver that's creeping along? What about those morons who don't seem to understand the words "yield" or "merge"? I say that there ought to be a special license that designates if a person can go anywhere NEAR the interstate, highway, or even a main thoroughfare. What do you think?

How about shopping? You go into your local Wal-Mart (yea, that's still our only choice) and you see all of these registers in a neat little row. They even have these cool self check-out stations. Why are most of them always closed? I mean, what is the point of having all of those cashier points if they aren't going to be employed? And, hello? Do some people not understand what "20 items or less" means? Can't they count that high? Maybe there needs to be a training seminar that individuals have to pass before they're allowed to buy their weekly groceries.

Dining out... Most Fridays, I treat myself to lunch out somewhere. Usually at Chili's, since I know a lot of people who work there. It's nice to go into a place and have a relaxing hour or so with people stopping by to chat for a moment or two. BUT!!! I can't tell you how many times I've walked into a restaurant and eventually had to endure the huge group of people that have obviously had too much to drink (thus becoming loud and obnoxious) or the family whose children should be bound and gagged (again, loud and obnoxious). I've seen too much of the "thrifty tipper"... Don't people get that servers make LESS than minimum wage? And then there's the total sleeze that walks out without paying for his meal. Yup, I've actually seen that happen... more than once! So, I propose a "Diner's Priviledge Card". In order to obtain one, an individual must go through a rigorous training marathon that teaches him or her exactly what behavior is acceptable/expected in public eateries. It'd make MY Fridays so much nicer! I'm sure the same can be said for you.

Politicians and company CEOs should have to obtain a special license before they are even considered for the position. This license would be a binding contract. It would state that there be full disclosure of fiscal records and any holdings, personal or business-wise. I don't care if you get a blow job every Tuesday in the executive office. The liaisons I want to know about are those that will influence decisions you make affecting policies. I want to know that your finances are sound. And, every time you make a claim in the presence of two or more other people, you WILL be responsible for making certain that claim is followed through. If you say wages will be raised without loss of jobs, by damn that IS what will happen. Get my point?

Moving up a bit on the richter scale... the family pet. I don't care if its a $5000 pure-bred horse or a carnival goldfish named Bob. People should absolutely be required to have some sort of license or permit that proves they are capable of caring for an animal. This license should be very specific as to what type of animal as well. You want that fancy puppy in the pet store window? What do you know about it? Do you have any idea how big it will get? What kind of environment it was raised to endure? What about its temperament? Is it good with children or other animals? Or is it better off in a one puppy household? This license would require that the holder knows all about types of feed and feeding schedules and illnesses linked with that species. It would state that there is already a vet on hand (like having to prove one has car insurance before completing a purchase on a new car). If at any time, the vet can document that the animal hasn't been properly cared for, the animal would be taken from the home. Never ever should just anyone be allowed to "own" an animal.

Now, here's the biggie. Children. You killed Bob in less than a week and you want to have kids??? OMG Stop right there! There are far too many people in this world who shouldn't have the right to raise a gerbil much less a child. In fact, perhaps it should first be proven that a person CAN raise a pet before going on to sire progeny. If you're too busy to clean Stuart's cage, when do you think you'll have time to change a diaper? If you can't afford a decent feed, how can you pay for formula or baby food? And if you don't have 20 minutes to throw the ball for Rover, where will you find time to help Junior with his homework? Kids are a job! They are a 24/7 bundle of need, not just a pretty picture in your wallet or that award hanging on your wall.

So, these are a few of my pet peeves. It's a rather utopian concept that I dream of wherein these examples of humanity should have restrictions... and it's just the few that have popped into my mind during these early morning hours. I'm sure that y'all have your own that you could add to the list... Special Licenses... Yea, that would be really really nice! LOL