Coping with ADD

The other day, I had the misfortune of a long wait in a doctors office and had forgotten to bring along a book... Sacrilege, I know! I looked around, expecting to find ancient copies of Better Homes and Gardens (the New Victorian Craze!) or at least a National Geographic. Nope. Nothing. Nada. Just one half-shredded issue of Game and Fish in a basket full of "publications".

I don't know what to call those things... They haven't enough pages to be a magazine and they're too large to be called a pamphlet. You know the ones, all about various medical conditions. Well, lo and behold, there was one called "Attention: Information and Support for People Affected by AD/HD". Cool!

I picked it up and scanned through it. Lots about medicating and even an article in Spanish. But there was one particular article that caught my eye, "Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About AD/HD Coaching (But Were Too Busy to Ask)".

Back when I was young, ADD wasn't a known condition. I don't know if it was an available diagnosis, I only know that we never heard that term and no doctor ever suggested I might have it. When it was finally discovered that I am in fact ADD, I was already at that stage of my life in which I don't care for the idea of taking drugs for much of anything (there are a few exceptions, but I won't go into that here). Instead, I learned my own little coping mechanisms... All on my own! Aren't you proud of me??? LOL

Anyway, back to the article.

It seems that the idea behind this AD/HD coaching is sort of like AA or a Quit Smoking or Weight Loss program in that it provides the client with someone to back up the medication with a reinforcement regime and positive motivation. It's written by Nancy Ratey, EdM, MCC, SCAC (whatever all of those initials might represent!). What caught my attention (no pun intended) was her "Seven Coaching Tips".

1. Pre-Plan the Day Before
Always plan the next day before going to bed. This way you’ll have in your mind what you are going to do, when, and how. You will wake up more directed and centered.
2. Create Book Ends
Get up and go to bed at the same time each day. Having regular body rhythms, as well as predictability and consistency in your schedule, will help increase efficiency.
3. Exercise! Exercise! Exercise!
This is KEY to peak performance and to gaining focus and control. Don’t skip it ever!
4. Think in Terms of Threes
To reduce stress, ask yourself to name the three most pressing items for the day that, once completed, will make you feel a sense of accomplishment. These do not have to be BIG items; they can be returning a phone call, filing a file, etc. Write them down and keep that list in front of you. Cross each item off as you complete it. Then move to your next three pressing items.
5. Stop Avoiding
A well-known author once told me, “You become the first thing you do in the morning. If you want to be a writer, write.” People in general know which item on their to-do list that they want to do last. Identify that item and do it first. That is the first step in gaining control!
6. Park It
Distracted by random thoughts? Park them on a piece of notepaper to stay focused on the task at hand! By doing so you can go back to these items later and act on them if necessary. Often these distractions are just that distractions and not priority items.
7. Take Time to Play
Take time off as seriously as you do your year-end report. The cost-benefit of not taking breaks from today’s busy life only sets you up for burnout and loss of control.

Until I read this article, I hadn't realized that my personal coping methods were actually legitimate. I was amazed! And, here my kids just thought I was being anal. No. I've always told them that it's the only way I can get things accomplished since I'm so easily distracted (ooooooo shiny things... ). Here's my take on Ms. Ratey's steps:

1. Pre-Planning
At night before I do my boring little ritual (see prior post on ADD), I think about what I need to do the next day. Then I put these things into a sensible (to me) order. If I don't do it, then I don't typically accomplish much. It REALLY helps if I actually write myself a list, but that doesn't always happen. Witness, last night was an uncomfortable night for me so here I am writing this rather than getting to the things I should. I failed to create a plan.

2. Create Book Ends
I go to bed when I'm tired, so I guess I've never consciously tried this one. However, I usually wake up about the same time each morning and have my own morning rituals that I follow (read OCD!). After that, well, it depends on how well I've followed step 1.

3. Exercise! Exercise! Exercise!
Yuck! Yuck! Yuck! Yea, I DO have to have some sort of active period in my day. I try to make it something fun. Sometimes it's a game of musical furniture. In the spring, it might be musical garden! I had thought I'd reached the age at which I didn't need to move so much, but I recently had a friend nickname me "Pop Tart"... Guess I was wrong! Right now, I suppose my PT regime falls under the category of exercise (I can even read while I'm doing the routines on the Total Gym. Nifty, eh?). I've tried walking. Boring! Maybe someone out there can give me some pointers on this one? I've been forbidden to do yoga or real weights right now and can't do aerobics because of my knees. Frustrating!

4. Think in Terms of Threes
I've always kept a short list in my planning, then a list of "if I get this done, I can...". None of the things were as simple as the ones she suggests. But she has a great point about the short list. A sense of having met a goal spurs me on.

5. Stop Avoiding
Oh God! I am the world's WORST procrastinator! LOL Read this one over and over and over... It is a must!

6. Park It
Yup... Make those lists. There's a sign in ASL that can be interpreted as "off point", meaning to stray from the topic. That's me in a nutshell. I get so pissed at myself when I forget things I want to do. Definitely makes me a cranky girl and that helps nothing.

7. Take Time to Play
Did I mention that I'm sitting here at the computer rather than doing what I should??? I take my play time QUITE seriously. I blog, have pages on Myspace, Facebook, and Twitter, and I have friends with whom I e-mail on a regular basis. New comments and chatty e-mails are what make my day more positive and goad me on to do what I need to do. I also read and paint when the mood strikes me.

So, you see, my brain actually figured out something right all on its own. Amazing!

Whether you take medication for ADD or not, follow these pointers. They're great.

And, so I will leave you with a poem that I wrote back in 1992. This is really how my mind works... Scary, I know! LOL

I Can’t Think!

Firecrackers of color

explode in my brain.

Ideas plip-plop.....Wait!

What was that?

She said what?

I can’t do it!....or can I?

If I try?

What if I did this....

Frustration, confusion,

immense desperation.

INPUT........IN

PUT.....INPUT

Thousands of ideas

incomplete.

I feel another thought.....

I can’t believe he said that.....

What point was I making?

Who did what?

How could I......

But what should I......

I forget......

HELP!!!!!!

Physical Therapy is AWESOME!

I can't believe I said that, but there ya go!

I've been through PT for various reasons many times and never thought much of it. It was always for a specific injury, so that may be why. Or perhaps the therapist didn't really understand how strong and flexible I normally am. I don't know.

I now have a host of injuries that make daily routine quite difficult... and forget exercise! If I want to work this area, that area prohibits the exercise and so on. As a result, I've become soft and weak and it pisses me off!

To give you an idea... I danced for a large portion of my life. Jazz, ballet, lyrical or simply out boogying on the dance floor. I LOVE to dance, but now I'm doing good to last through one song. We live in the country, so throughout my kids' childhood we had a ton of animals... horses, goats, chickens, ducks, dogs, cats, etc... I used to haul 50 lb. sacks of feed and bales of hay. I used to build things. Not little things, but plank-built pieces of furniture. Along with some friends with the know-how, we literally built the house we now live in. My hands have been on every piece of wood in this home in some capacity, either by hauling it, cutting, nailing, staining, whatever. You get the gist.

Now I have a host of injuries. I won't go into the specifics, but from bottom up: Morton's neuromas in both feet, plates and screws in the right leg, FUBAR'd knees and back, both wrists, elbows and the left shoulder are a mess. Kind of makes things difficult. Pain has become my constant companion, although some days are better than others.

You might have read some of my other posts and gotten the idea that I'm not big on pharmaceutical relief. You'd be right. I try my doctor's patience beyond belief. LOL Bless her heart!

Recently, she sent me to this physical therapist... That was the biggest blessing I've had in a long time. This woman is INCREDIBLE! She spent more than an hour simply doing an evaluation. She took it all into consideration and I began my rehabilitation that day. It's only been three weeks and the improvement is unbelievable.

I realize that this is a long-term commitment and things won't occur overnight. But the past Monday and Tuesday nights, I actually SLEPT ALL NIGHT LONG! It's probably been 15 - 20 years since that happened. And when I awoke each morning, I only had a few minutes of mild pain versus the excruciating pain I usually deal with for the first half hour or so of each day. Amazing! I don't know if this is the new world of PT or if I've just been lucky enough to find someone special, but I feel I'm truly blessed.

By habit, I observe people and have watched other clients while I do my therapy three days a week. This woman works with such a wide variety of patients and injuries. She's definitely hands on and knowledgeable. She pays attention and makes certain that minute adjustments are made and explained, but she also explains WHY. You have no clue how important that is to me.

Right now, she's working on endurance, so perhaps it's psychosomatic, but I swear that I already feel stronger. I know I feel more positive about my future. I don't mind the numbers in my age, but my body failing me is something I'm not ready to accept. I hate the word "limitations" and have lived with them for far too long. I don't expect miracles, but improvement is right around the corner. I can't wait!

Exercise... Can we say "Ewww"?

I walk a mile most mornings. Yup, three laps around our pond, making certain to take all of the ins and outs of the pond's shape. I probably COULD do more laps and I probably SHOULD, but... How do I put this? It bores the shit out of me!

In my art studio, I have one of those Total Gyms. Great piece of machinery. A person can exercise almost any part of the body. I look at it several times a day and think "why?"

Face it folks. Exercising by oneself is boring as hell. I sit on the Total Gym sometimes, responsibly doing my leg presses and think of all of the things that I could be doing that are far more interesting... Like watching concrete set or cleaning the toilet.

I danced on and off, ballet, jazz, lyrical, from the time I was four until I blew my knees when I was thirty-five. When I was in my 20's, I was a personal trainer at a gym. I KNOW what I should be doing.

I'm one of those people who really needs to have a work-out partner. It's even better if I don't LIKE that partner... "Ha! That bitch did 25 reps. Watch this people, I'm gonna do FIFTY!". Yea, that's me! I'm bad!

So, it seems that actually GOING to the gym would be the solution. Nope. Do you realize just how many excuses I can invent for simply not getting into my car? And then I think about the fact that I have to PAY someone for the information that resides in my tiny little brain each time I encounter THEIR personal trainers. Ugh!

Let me tell ya, honey... There is nothing "Golden" about this era of my life. The muscles are atrophying at an alarming rate and I don't believe my body HAS a metabolism any more. Yup, that baby's gone! I eat fairly healthy foods (fried foods and greasy snacks make me ill), mostly of the vegetable persuasion and I limit my chocoholic tendencies to 2 or 3 individually wrapped pieces per day. Hell... sin of sins... I've even begun limiting my Margaritas. What's wrong with this picture?

Do you ever feel like sending threatening letters to Madonna and Cher?... "Look, you sluts, gain weight, turn grey, and start sagging like the rest of the female population or I will bomb your aesthetician's practice." Those magazine pics damn well better be airbrushed or I give up!

So I walk my petty mile each morning and glare at my exercise videos and Total Gym in accusation (shouldn't they work simply because I OWN them?), then sit my ass down to read my twelfth book of the week or post something new in here... ANYthing to avoid that dreaded word, "exercise".

Anyway, here's a little humor (from one of my favorite e-mails) to take you through your day:

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A WOMAN'S WEEK AT THE GYM

Dear Diary,

For my birthday this year, my daughter (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me. Although I am still in great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try. I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Belinda, who identified herself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear. My daughter seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress.

________________________________

MONDAY:

Started my day at 6:00 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Belinda waiting for me. She is something of a Greek goddess - with blond hair, dancing eyes and a dazzling white smile. Woo Hoo!! Belinda gave me a tour and showed me the machines. I enjoyed watching the skillful way in which she conducted her aerobics class after my workout today. Very inspiring! Belinda was encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already aching from holding it in the whole time she was around. This is going to be a FANTASTIC week-!!

________________________________

TUESDAY:

I drank a whole pot of coffee, but I finally made it out the door. Belinda made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air then she put weights on it! My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made the full mile. Belinda's rewarding smile made it all worthwhile. I feel GREAT-!! It's a whole new life for me.

_______________________________

WEDNESDAY:

The only way I can brush my teeth is by laying the toothbrush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it. I believe I have a hernia in both pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn't try to steer or stop. I parked on top of a GEO in the club parking lot. Belinda was impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered other club members. Her voice is a little too perky for that early in the morning and when she scolds, she gets this nasally whine that is VERY annoying. My chest hurt when I got on the treadmill, so Belinda put me on the stair monster. Why the hell would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity rendered obsolete by elevators? Belinda told me it would help me get in shape and enjoy life. She said some other shit too.

_______________________________

THURSDAY:

Belinda was waiting for me with her vampire-like teeth exposed as her thin, cruel lips were pulled back in a full snarl. I couldn't help being a half an hour late - it took me that long to tie my shoes. Belinda took me to work out with dumbbells. When she was not looking, I ran and hid in the restroom. She sent another skinny bitch to find me. Then, as punishment, she put me on the rowing machine -- which I sank.

_________ _ _____________________

FRIDAY:

I hate that bitch Belinda more than any human being has ever hated any other human being in the history of the world. Stupid, skinny, anemic, anorexic little cheerleader. If there was a part of my body I could move without unbearable pain, I would beat her with it. Belinda wanted me to work on my triceps. I don't have any triceps! And if you don't want dents in the floor, don't hand me the damn barbells or anything that weighs more than a sandwich. The treadmill flung me off and I landed on a health and nutrition teacher. Why couldn't it have been someone softer, like the drama coach or the choir director?

________________________________

SATURDAY:

Belinda left a message on my answering machine in her grating, shrilly voice wondering why I did not show up today. Just hearing her voice made me want to smash the machine with my planner; however, I lacked the strength to even use the TV remote and ended up catching eleven straight hours of the Weather Channel.

________________________________

SUNDAY:

I'm having the Church van pick me up for services today so I can go and thank GOD that this week is over. I will also pray that next year my daughter (the little shit) will choose a gift for me that is fun -- like a root canal or a hysterectomy. I still say if God had wanted me to bend over, he would have sprinkled the floor with diamonds!!!